As long as they are healthy..... Yeah right!

I have been asked so many times (as are ALL mums of boys I am sure!) if we will have another baby so we can try for a little girl.
We have two gorgeous boys and are VERY lucky to even have those. 

Our journey to parenthood wasn't what we expected at all, so for people to presume we would ask for anything, other than a healthy child, can be rather annoying over time.

When someone says "as long as they are healthy" they have NO idea what that really means to a family who has been on the other side of that scenario. 

To have a child that is not in fact born healthy like everyone brags is heartbreaking and it drives me insane at times when people throw the good old "as long as they are healthy" line without knowing what others have endured. I actually briefly felt jealous at times (very briefly!) of people that had been lucky enough to have a healthy child at the time our first born arrived.

I know people mean well and never say it with malice, but I do often wish people realised what they were saying to some mums who haven't been so lucky. We were one of the fortunate families that now have a happy child to be thankful for...  Not all families can say the same.

To wish for either sex is something I would never dream of, I know people have the right to yearn for either a boy or girl, but I could never be that presumptuous.  I do get annoyed when someone is upset that they are not pregnant with the gender they really longed for.  Although I would never say anything and realise we are all entitled to our own choices.

Through out my whole pregnancy with our second child I was just praying to god that he was born healthy and we didn't have another battle ahead of us.

So my short answer is NO I do NOT want a girl, if I were to have another child I would once again just be praying that they were in fact a healthy child and we were blessed to be one of the lucky families who take healthy children for granted.

Are you a mum of all boys or girls?  Do you often find yourself defending your decision for wanting a healthy baby no matter what their gender?


Anonymous said…
I have one of each.
People say oh aren't you lucky? Oh,you did well.
They assume I don't want any more because of that.
I just want healthy as well.
Bummy_87 said…
I had 2 boys n I was lucky to have my 3rd a girl but im more lucky she is healthy. Would've been just as happy with a boy but ur right alot of people are much like that. evertime I.see an unhealthy baby I,just wanna cry even if its just low birth weight no cold should have 2 suffer. Especially upsets me when I see parents to be smoking or drinking then they have an unhealthy baby that didn't deserve 2 be born that way um anyway kids r jumping on me
marlin300 said…
Well honey you know our story. After having 4 beautiful girls and a wonderful boy, we lost our boy at 10 months. It was amazing how many times when I would go out with you girls that people would say; 'Oh I bet you wanted a boy, or are you going to try for a boy". We soon learnt to shut them up by saying' we had a boy but he died'......a little harsh but it soon put them in their place. One should never presume that just because a family is all one sex that they haven't had the pleasure of having the other.
Sorry to hear of your loss marlin300 xx
I have three beautiful boys and whilst I would of loved a little girl I know I was blessed with those little guys for a reason. I had 3 miscarriages and eVen though I wondered about the sex of those babies, I was so so grateful that my other pregnancies eventuates in 3 healthy children that just happened to be boys. Xx