Kids are NOT a fashion accessory!

My FB status tonight reads -
Parenting is NOT easy, it is NOT always fun, it is NOT a fashion accessory and it is NOT something you can turn on and off when you feel like it..... A parent is 24/7, 365 days a year. Wish some people could understand that!
I struggle to make people understand what it is really like being a parent. Those that don't have children just don't get it!  
No matter how hard you try to explain to them that your child is ALWAYS the number one priority and when it all boils down sometimes it is just NOT worth uprooting their routine no matter what YOU think and how easy it is in YOUR opinion to do!
A parents role is not one you can step in and out of as you choose, it is not something you switch off at the end of the day and forget about until you wake in the morning.
Kids are NOT something you drag around with you like an expensive handbag to make you look good. They are a priority, a way of life, the air you breath and so much more.
Do you have a friend in your life that just will never understand what life is like as a parent until it smacks them in the face and gives them a good kick up the arse?


Sounds like someone's seriously got under your skin!! Yes we have someone like this in our lives - my mother-in-law, I seriously don't know how CRAP Dadda and his siblings survived because this woman is the most selfish person I know and after nearly 6 years still doesn't get that we just can't sit around with her and drink cups of tea all day 1. because i'd rather pull my eyelashes out one by one and 2. because I'd rather be spending time fighting wars and digging holes with my kids. She's one of those 'just doesn't get it' kinda people!! Makes my blood boil!!
My Mummy Daze said…
I lost a friend because of this. I totally relate to your frustration. I guess they'll learn in their own time. My kids always come first, except when I guiltily put myself first to straighten out my sanity, and then they're back to be number one.
Anonymous said…
I have family like this. My Mother is insistent that kids live around their parents. I wrote a blog post about it, and about the pressure I feel from some people (yes you mum) to interrupt my daughter's routine. She told me I was wrong. My therapist says it all makes sense...
Thanks for your comments girls.

This is something that really bugs me with family and friends that just don't get it.
Unknown said…
I was probably one of those people before I had my son. I think it's partly in my case because none of my friends with kids every really explained how hard it can be and what it really is like to be a parent. Of course I get it now, but the media and sometimes other mum's not telling it like it is does give the wrong idea to non-parents. Sounds like you have tried explaining so your situation is different.
Makes it hard when it is a family member or close friend that you just can't relate to anymore because of their lack in understanding. I am really finding it a struggle lately, and I am sick of feeling like I am the one doing the wrong thing by putting my own family (children) first above others. Why can't people see that is what you do when you grow up, get married and have your own children.. GAH!!
Unknown said…
very well said!
I have also lost a friend because of this.
Anonymous said…
I've lost a friend, too, because she thought I was selfish and only cared about myself and my son. I've been feeling guilty all this time thinking, 'what if she was write, what if I had made more effort?' It makes me feel so much better reading your post and all the comments.
Glow said…
Definitely know a few people like this. I knew parenting would be hard before I had my son, but I obviously didn't know just how hard.
I just sit and wait until they have kids... I won't say "I told you so" out loud but you can bet I'll be thinking it!
EssentiallyJess said…
Oh I get this. But what is worse is the parents who have kids who sleep anywhere, any time! I've got four, and none of them have done that, so when I get some smug mother with one who is an absolute angel tell me what to do to get them to sleep, then I get frustrated! It's for my sanity as a parent that I keep to routine.
Carly Webber said…
Yip, can relate to this, well said!
I have young babies/toddlers and I even find this of friends with older kids, they forget how demanding the routines and needs of little ones are and expect you to be able to keep up with them and their mobile family; how can they possibly have forgotten???